STD paranoia going crazy?

I’ve always had certain things I stick to: if I’m not officially dating someone, I will do mutual masturbation but no sex of any sort (I’ve broken this a few times, but whatever). Anyway, my doctors and everyone else, including my parents, have told me that these activities are safe, because skin-skin contact STDs are mainly spread through mucous membranes, like the mouth and genitals, which would not be involved, unless you have an immunity problem. But now everyone is saying that handjobs carry so much risk, even though my doctor and STD specialists have told me they are safe. I’m so scared, because I can’t tell every guy I make out with, or do boob play with, to get an STD test! In an ideal world, maybe, but you can’t tell someone to get a test if you’re not even official.